Isnt life strange and quite bazzar how even we as SO called living Christians walk with scales over our eyes and bars around our hearts. Even we who think/feel we have a relationship with God, think we know how to talk to him, feel we love him and have a passion and drive to serve him...yet fail to be like him.... We still lack the real "Jesus Love"... love that still loves despite all the physical & verbal abuse. Love that still loves even after been beaten for speaking the truth. Love that still loves despite our greed, hatred and selfishness.
Love that thought of us, even when we paid him little attention. As I reflect and compare myself to how Jesus would like me to be I'm pretty disgusted. How easily we are offended by petty words and actions. How easily we allow these things create a barriers between family and friends. Because of this we lose precious opportunities to sow seeds and share words of encouragemnet. We don't get to tell them how much we love them and what they mean to us.
Until it reach's a point when its too late... to late to say anything. Your left with painful memories/flashbacks of wasted occassions to share love. Your haunted by "Why didn't I?, I wish I could go back.... thoughts that play and rewind..play and rewind... relentlessly....
The ultimate killer daggar in my heart is having lost my uncle. Not just in this world but for eternity. For this I am paying a heavy price and will one day give an account for... I have no assurance that he believed...I just pray that at some point in his life he opened his heart to Jesus. If not I pray that he used his last breath to speak to Jesus.I pray God has mercy on his soul. And us that are left behind I pray that we learn from this and never NEVER give the devil a chance to play this card in ours lives again....
Regretful, sorrowful
Sara.x..
